Tuesday 2 April 2024

Kiss any sense of dignity goodbye

I have not yet been transferred to a rehab facility. I have been told there is nothing further they can do for me and the next phase is rehab. I am lying in a hospital bed with my two broken legs encased in braces, my left arm with the broken wrist still in a cast, and injured ribs.

I do not have much mobility. I can move my legs from side to side, wiggle my toes, move my feet, and barely lift my legs a half inch up for a few seconds. I am getting more sensation in my legs and I know I am getting better as the days go by. The upper half is fine. Rib pain has largely went away. Otherwise all I am doing is taking up space until I can be moved elsewhere.

The problem is that I need help with a lot of things. I have gained a little independence but used to need help with everything. I mean everything. I would get a meal dropped off and I used to need help with setting the meal. If I need to get cleaned up I get washed down on the bed while I am lying down and rolled on either side while your areas get washed. 

The worst is when you need to do certain other things. I have become somewhat proficient at sensing when I need a bedpan and using one. This is a skill I will cheerfully discard once this episode in my life is over. 

Being in this position has been demeaning, degrading, embarrassing, and at times humiliating. I learned to quickly roll with it and tossed any sense of dignity out the window long ago. I think every nurse on the ward has seen all of me at one time. Thankfully they have all been great. 


  1. Yeah, there's no such thing as privacy or decorum in the hospital. Glad to hear you are healing, slowly but surely. I hope you are able to be transferred to Rehab as soon as a spot opens up.

  2. Yes, dignity is pretty much something you need to leave at the door...that, and the hope for a good night's sleep.